How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
