id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
