Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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