I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
