I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
