hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
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