You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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