If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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