Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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