He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
And then my night got REAL pukey
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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