Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize
