we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
