I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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