My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
