found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
