I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
