she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
