You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize