If that was your dad, he is hot
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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