I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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