seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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