So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
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I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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