If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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