You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
True strength comes from lack of pants
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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