Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Randomize
