Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
