but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
