Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
