idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
