I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
wow bdsm is so cute
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
