You can't special order awesome
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka?
Forever.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
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