I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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