I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
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