Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
