4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
lol hangovers are for mortals.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Randomize
