i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
