Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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