What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
