I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Randomize
