Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
It's never too late to be topless.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize