when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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