are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize