i permit you to call me
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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