I should be sponsored by Trojan
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
