I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
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