living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
