am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
