I wannas sexs uuuuu
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
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