come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
