he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize