Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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